Black Lives Matter and Black Size Matters

The Kardashians are of Armenian descent. Ever since the massacre of 200,000 of them by the Turks in 1890s, the Armenians have been in no mood for any funny joke. So instead, here is a Polish joke supposedly told by Steve Wozniak, a Polish-American, the Apple co-founder, and a star in Season 8 of 'Dancing With the Stars':
"What does a Polish bride get on her wedding night that is long and hard?" Answer  

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"A new last name".

You may protest that the last name of the joke teller, Steve Wozniak, may be hard but not long.
Well, 'Wozniak' is actually an Americanized short version of original Polish name which is 'Wozniakianjikolenxymirudimentoraxupoqasjawetychovetski'.

Q: Do Polish names always end in "ski" ?
A: No, "ski" is actually a modern day Polish invention, a shorthand for 'szohenghulmanzhukjelhavqodsufaxhi '.

The Kardashian's Polish Connection.
Rumor has it that Kourtney Kardashian's boyfriend, Scott Disick, is of Royal Polish blood and looks down upon Kardashians' un-sophisticated 'reality' lives. The believers point to his princely good look and his low intellect, the result of European royal inbreeding, to support their arguments. But the non-believers dismiss the rumor outright because of Scott's short last name. The following story apparently settles the issue. However, it turns out to be an R-rated offensive tale not suitable for the gentle souls. So, the story is retold here in a subtle form and in fine print. It will take a lot of patience and intense concentration, which the minors totally lack, to read the entire story. Here it goes:

Kourtney Kardashian, after having three kids with Scott Disick, decided to have no more. So Scott goes to the hospital and has the vasectomy done. After the operation, Kourtney comes to visit and pays Scott her respect. The male nurse, who regularly changes the dressings, teases Kourtney, "You have one hell of naughty boyfriend in there who tattoos the word 'Dick' on his humanhood". Kourtney is a little bit confused and says, "No, it is not 'Dick'; it is 'Disick', his name". The male nurse disagrees so Kourtney calls out to Scott, "Honey, is that your name you have it tattooed down there?" Scott yells back, "Yes it is, honey, it's my last name." Kourtney smiles triumphantly. The male nurse can't believe it and won't accept defeat. When a female nurse shows up, he asks for her be the judge and to check out the tattooed word. Kourtney agrees. So the female nurse goes inside the private room, carefully checks the hood, and writes down the word on a piece of paper. When she comes out, the male nurse and Kourtney ask, “Is it a 'Dick' or a 'Disick'?” Surprisingly, the female nurse responds, "No, it is neither. Actually, It is a long word that I have to write it down". "Here it is", she looks at the paper and spells out Scott's original last name, "Disghokinjilenxymirudikomchovetewetyantoraxupoqasjaweychovetyick".

There it is and you have the answers! From this story we can comfortably reach at least four conclusions:
1) With that kind of last name, Scott is definitely a Polish descent.
2) 'Disick' is actually an Americanized short version, the first 3 and the last 3 letters, of Scott’s royal family name, which is also his original last name that he proudly tattoos on the most precious organ of his body. (The Disick's royal house motto is 'Never Forget Your Root'.)
3) Scott genuinely likes Kourtney and is happy to see her every time. He is always an exciting 'Disick', not a sleepy 'Dick', to Kourtney.
4) The female nurse must be very, very, very pretty.

Reference: What Nationality Is The Surname, Disick?   alt   Copy